Insights on American Life Today
Exploring the heart of America through thoughtful commentary.
Insights on American Life Today
Exploring the heart of America through thoughtful commentary.
What made America great was our MORALITY, not our affluence or politics! (07/29/2025)
I am a first-generation immigrant. I have now been in this country for almost 40 years. I have also lived in a half dozen other countries, before I moved to the US. I have worked in or travelled through at least 20 more.
People immigrated to this country for different reasons – most came because of the economic opportunities; some came to flee political persecution; others came because it was a best place to bring up their families, or educate our children. I came here for one reason, & one reason alone – our moral fiber!
I brought my family to America because it was the most innocent; nicest society I had ever come across. Irrespective of our politics, & what our politicians did, we as a Society almost always did the right thing. What is different about today is that our politics is all that defines us – we are demonized if we are a part of the other team, and we become ‘patriots’ if we are on the same team. We are so busy demonizing the other side, that we have forgotten who we ourselves are, or at least were!
We seem to have given up everything – our humanity; our morality, and our empathy. We have become our politicians, and worse. Democracy today is in peril all over the world, but history has shown us that leaders will come and go, but eventually the Will of the people will prevail. I think it was Mahatma Gandhi who had said "When I despair, I remember that all through history the ways of truth and love have always won. There have been tyrants, and murderers, and for a time they can seem invincible, but in the end they always fall. Think of it - always."
This moment in history shall no doubt pass. The question, each of us has to ask ourselves, is how much of ‘us’ is left, when it is all said and done. It is that ‘us’ that will determine whether we can look our children & grandchildren, in the eye. It is that collective ‘us’ which will be reflected, in the annals of history.
I just want to be clear that I am not suggesting that America has been perfect - far from it! We have been plagued with racism; economic inequity; starvation (unforgivable in a country that has so much); infant mortality; hypocrisy in our domestic & foreign policies and so on BUT, as an immigrant who has travelled the world, I can tell you with some conviction that America – with all its flaws – was still the nicest country (by far) I have ever lived in, or travelled to. Imperfect as we have been, our intent has always been to keep chipping away so that every tomorrow, is better than today.
The last few years have seen the precipitous destruction of that very morality which brought me to this country, in the first place. Our rhetoric has become toxic; women’s rights have gone back a century; civil rights have already gone to back to the 1960’s; our voting rights are under attack; our immigration policy has gone back to the 1940’s... The bottom line is that, for most of us, ‘today’ is worse than ‘yesterday’, and has been for a long time. The question is what are we going to do about it?
My brain could always justify as to why it is not my fight - first it was my own health issues: I have undergone brain surgery; spinal surgery; detached retinal surgery; Diagnosed with Parkinson’s & a bunch of others not worth discussing.
When those came and went, the excuse was the welfare & safety of my wife & children; that was replaced by “I am living a comfortable life why mess with a good thing”; then came “They will take away my Nationality & deport me……to a country that is not my country of origin” or “ I will end up in a concentration camp & on and one and on…..
I woke up this morning and realized that it will never be the right time for me to get off my couch, unless the ‘fire’ is at my door. Then came the ‘epiphany’ – when the world is on fire; the fire will seldom ring my door bell, when it reaches my door! More importantly, came the realization that allowing the destruction of the very reason I brought my children (when they were babies) to this country is not only unfair to them, but also unfair to the country that has given my family and me so much!
For what it is worth, I have voted both Democrat & Republican in the past. I have done so based on who I thought was right for the country, and not the Party they came from.
Having said all that, I am proud to say “I am; have always been & will always be a NEVER Trumper”. This is not because of his or my politics, and nor a judgment of his competence or lack thereof (I do have view on that as well but that is for another time). He and I were brought up with different value systems and I thought -apparently incorrectly- those value systems; ethics & morality mattered in America. It did not:
• The America I loved would never elect someone who talked about playing with women’s p##sies, without their consent. In fact, it would not have even been up for discussion!
• The America I loved would not have even considered electing someone with so many accusations and litigations against him, be they from women; creditors or Constitutional lawyers, and yet here we are
• Electing someone who talked about walking into the dressing rooms of young women at a beauty pageant would also not have been up for discussion….
• It was political suicide to demean a veteran, particularly one who has sacrificed his or her life; limbs or been a prisoner of war, and yet here we are ….
• A shake of the hand was considered an agreement and yet here we are cheering as our leaders tear up written agreements – both domestic & international.
• Friendship meant everything and yet here we are now distancing countries that have always had our backs, and backing countries who have always carried a knife, to put in our backs.
• Even in our jails, a pedophile had to worry about his/her safety because somehow even the most hardened criminal could not forgive someone who had molested or raped a child, & yet here we are even discussing the prospect of a pardon to Ghislaine Maxwell, after she has been moved to more of country club than a jail, by our government.
• No one, in the America I loved, would have called what we saw transpire on live TV on Jan 6th patriotism, and yet that is what our President called them, issued them blanket pardons.
• In the America I knew, it was possible to disagree and still have civil discourse. Today most of us (me included) first tries listen carefully to see if one can gage a person’s political leanings &, based on that alone, we decide on whether or not he/she is a good human being.
I can go on and on, but this blog is not about politics, but it is about my (and I hope our collective) morality. I recognize that the ‘moral’ line is different for everybody. Mine was crossed the day Trump talked about touching women’s pu##ies, and since then I cannot even remember how many times my moral lines have been crossed. Each of us has to decide as to when (if at all) that line has been crossed for us?
I have a lot of very good friends who voted for Trump and tell me that they voted for him, even though some of the stuff he does or says makes their skin crawl. “All politicians are crooks” they say “but at least we are better off economically; or we need someone like him to shake up Washington” and a host of other reasons, all of which is debatable (for another day).
The question we have to ask ourselves (even assuming we are better all off- and we are not!) is at what price? If thanks to his economic policies, I become a millionaire, will I allow him to play with a daughter’s pu##y, or even talk about it? If the roads are paved with gold and the roses that grow in my garden are devoid of thorns, thanks to Mr. Trump (or anyone else), am I willing to discard everything that my parents, grandparents and others along the way taught me? Each time I take a decision that is fundamentally against my ‘very core’ an inner voice in me always tells me wrong from right and every time I silence it, a part of me gets destroyed. If I do it long enough, I suspect that inner voice will stop talking to me then there will be no ‘me’ left! That is not a price I am willing to pay, for all the money in the world.
I fear we have already walked a path too far to see the America I knew again, at least in my lifetime. I hope someday, as a Society, we find our way back so that the next generation can see why I came to America in the first place!
I am sure there will be people who will read this and ask me to get out of their country! To them, I say “I came to this country before half of you came into this world. My children have lived here virtually all their lives. I will fight to defend every inch of this land, that has given me so much. Don’t you dare tell me to get out!”.
To that one person who does not know me, but nonetheless read this document, thank you for the privilege of your time. There are some things that I still need to get off my chest, so I will write more blogs every Tuesday following this one.
Who knew that I would miss the days of our hypocrisy! (08/05/2025)
There are not enough words in the English dictionary to describe how much this country has meant to me. As I said in my first blog, we are far from perfect but I chose to come to this country because it was better than any, that I personally had lived in, or visited.
That having been said, our policies and our politics have often been hypocritical. We always had double standards, and pretended that the standards were the same – how we policed our minority communities Vs white communities; viewed a flood in New Orleans Vs NYC; addressed a genocide in the likes of Sudan or Congo Vs the Israel /Palestine conflict; often slept with the devil, in our foreign policies, and tried to sell to the world that they were Saints …. of all of them, the Palestine issue has always been the one that got under my skin the most. We have always been seen as a nation that lectures the world on morality, and yet for decades we have followed a policy that is both hypocritical and immoral.
I know that I may get the most push back on this issue, so before I go further, let me address a couple of things, so it is not seen as partisan politics:
1) Every President (Democrat or Republican) has been guilty of at least utter hypocrisy, if not immorality on the Palestine issue. All done under the garb of Israel is our ally and friend, and therefore it is incumbent upon us to support a friend.
First of all, we have left a trail of befriending nations, and then leaving them high & dry, but that is for another day. Secondly, a friend – more than anyone else – needs to be told when he/she is doing the immoral thing. The truth is that every politician, in my lifetime, has sided with Israel because the possibility of getting elected to the White House, without the support of the Israeli faction, is impossible- Israeli, not Jewish. Almost every one of my Jewish friends are for a two state solution, & intensely critical of the Netanyahu policies!
2) My greatest disappointment, in this regard, was President Biden. Whatever one may think of his policies (& I thought his legislative achievements are historic); almost no one will doubt his humanity, empathy or his love for this Nation. No one will also doubt his knowledge and understanding of international politics. It is precisely that humanity; compassion & understanding that gave us (me at least) a false of sense of security that he will do the moral thing in Gaza/Palestine. He was not only hypocritical but, in my view, complicit in this carnage. He continued to supply an immoral, genocidal leader of Israel arms, to carry out this carnage! We are now all witness to -and sorry to say party to- one of the greatest genocides in history…..Yes genocide!
America has found itself on the wrong side of history many times, but I can think of none that will be seen more shameful. The sheer hypocrisy of our leaders pretending to take the high moral ground, drove me insane.
Who knew that I would miss (sort of) those days – the good old days of hypocrisy! As someone once said to me “the thing about life is that a problem that consumes us today; will be replaced by bigger problems tomorrow…..& tomorrow you will look back at today as the good old days!”.
Today, hypocrisy does not seem so bad? Israel has wiped out Gaza; Russia will wipe out Ukraine simply because they can! We do not, any longer, have to even pretend that we care about the optics of a Nation being destroyed; the carnage of a Society or starving children because Societies that lack the military might have no cards to play! In fact, our President promises a sea side resort, once Israel has finished doing what it is doing- a sea side resort that is totally devoid of its present population!
We do not have to even pretend to be morally outraged by the actions of a despicable Saudi king, because he apparently epitomizes our definition of strength and leadership. Morality be damned! We welcome, to our shores, a tyrant like Putin with a red carpet and a flypast
Today, it is ok to be openly racist; misogynistic; disrespectful; corrupt; communal. It is ok to demean your neighbor because he/she disagrees with you, on your politics. It is ok to berate them, if they are a different color, or worship a different God, because our government itself has recruitment ads running, with the dog whistles of our white heritage. Sure the racists of the KKK and Proud boys always existed, but they hid their racists views under the proverbial carpet because the decency of our white neighbors scared them, more than any immigrant could. Today, “there are good people on both sides”; the only place where we see political persecution are the white farmers of South Africa & the only ones worthy of expeditious residency in the US. Any suggestion that that is wrong will be met with threats of “go back to your country” or worse still, we will deport you to a country that is neither your country of birth, nor your country of residence!
Today, we have no need to be hypocritical about our humanity because our strength lies in the optics of separating a breastfeeding baby, from a nursing mother or the scenes of multiple young, Huge, young ICE agents beating an old man, and telling us that this is how we will make America great again.
This is not about Trump; Miller or Kristi Noem because, to be fair, they had always telegraphed who they were – morally reprehensible, in my personal view. This is about us, as a Society, people like me (& almost half the Nation) whose ego’s cannot wrap their heads around the fact that a Trump could in fact be Democratically elected, in the America we knew. As much as it may make our soul cringe, we need to get over our pathetic self pity, because sometime democracy will sting you in the butt! Get off that stung butt & decide what YOU want to do about it!
I have a lot of very good friends who voted for Trump, both times. I do not consider a single one of these people racists. In fact, many of them, are better human beings than I will ever be! They voted Trump because they thought he would make lives better. To them, I say what I have been saying long before Trump became President the first time – decide today the price that you consider too high to sell your morality, for I guarantee that day shall come.
There are also some who voted for him because they are racists and want their white heritage back. To them I say, know that you are looking at the abyss. This thing is a like a flame – it keeps you mesmerized while it changes shape, color and size, but before you know it, it has burned your own house down. Today you are being told that if not for people like me; tomorrow it will be Mr. Trump’s own Jewish son in law and his grandchildren; the day after that it may be other immigrants – white or not. Then you may be living in or working for a Company owned by the Saudi king or some of these other non white countries, because of these big beautiful deals your President has made. What will you do then? Next they come because you are financially struggling and your house is spoiling the neighborhood and on and on.
I know some of you think that you voted for Trump and therefore it will always be the ‘other’ guy who will lose his job; the other guy whose daughter will make accusations of molestation or rape; it is the other guy whose child will need health care and have no means to to pay for it. It will not be you because, after all, you voted Trump.
I have a few neighbors and friends who had not only voted Trump but some were some of those who had 20 Vote Trump signs, on their lawn. Some even had signs asking immigrants to go home. They would say to me “You are ok. I do not mean you”. It drove me insane when they said that, & I would say to them “you may not know it but it is in fact me”!
Three of them – I am sorry to say – have since been laid off from their government jobs. My point is that you are that ‘other’ guy- if not today tomorrow, I guarantee it. I do not want you to think that I am wishing that you – far from it. I hope you never see that day. I am as distressed to see my three friends lose their jobs, as I would if one of my own children was laid off.
There is also a significant percentage of you who sat out the last election, because all politicians make you sick! I do not wish to judge you, or lecture you, but all I will say is that you too under the mis conception that as long as you have not taken sides in this divided world; you are safe. ….that other guy is also you!
I still hate hypocrisy but until our Nation can return to civil discourse; I would rather some things remain under the carpet! That statement itself is an example of how a part of us getting destroyed every day. A decade ago, it would inconceivable that I could complete a sentence that suggests hypocrisy, in any form, would be acceptable to me, and yet here we are a world full of lowered expectations, and a re-defined normal!
To that one person who does not know me, but nonetheless read this document, thank you for the privilege of your time. There are some things that I still need to get off my chest, so I will write more blogs every Tuesday following this one.
It has already happened to us! (08/12/2025)
In the mid 1980’s I used to work in London, England. In those days, I made a couple of elderly friends – one happened to live in a Hitler Germany and the other a Mussolini Italy. Every now and then, we would go out for lunch and I would ask them about what it was like to live in those two countries, at the time. The conversations were many but three things stood out to me because they kept repeating them and – even though they did not know each other - these were the common denominators:
(1) Some of what he (Hitler and Mussolini) said needed to be said. We would have probably used different words to say it, but at least he had the courage to say it, is what we thought initially.
(2) The rest of the stuff was garbage and we dismissed it as political theater, because we know that we were better than that as a nation. We did not think it could happen to us.
(3) If all else failed, we were confident that we had enough safeguards in the system to protect us!.
I wonder how many of us will be asked the question, sometime in the future, about what it was like to live in America today and what our answer will be:
"I don't even wait. And when you're a star, they let you do it. You can do anything. ... Grab 'em by the p##sy. You can do anything." Donald Trump to Billy Bush of Access Hollywood about a month before he was elected in 2016. We elected him twice since!
“I moved on her, and I failed. I'll admit it. I did try and f##k her. She was married and I moved on her very heavily. In fact, I took her out furniture shopping. She wanted to get some furniture. I said, "I'll show you where they have some nice furniture." I took her out furniture—I moved on her like a b##ch. But I couldn't get there. And she was married. Then all of a sudden I see her, she's now got these big phony ti#s and everything. She's totally changed her look”. Trump referring to Nancy O’Dell (ex colleague of Billy Bush) same Access Hollywood tape.
“I’ve known Jeff for 15 years. Terrific guy,” Trump told New York magazine in 2002. “He’s a lot of fun to be with. It is even said that he likes beautiful women as much as I do, and many of them are on the younger side.” We elected him twice since.
…..” Good people on both sides after the Proud boys” after the Proud Boys marched in Charlottsville, VA. President Trump. I remember the outrage when he said it but today if that is all he has said, we view it as a good day!
“These people come from shithole nations” referring to African nations; Haiti and El Salvador. We would rather get immigrants from Norway. Trump said in 2018….I think of this in the context of my conversations with my two old friends from Germany & Italy: “Some of what he said needed to be said but ……”
“The participants in January 6th were patriots who were treated very badly” Trump before blanket pardoning them. Think about it in the context of my conversations with my two friends we “had enough safeguards…..it could not happen to us”.
I could probably write 50 pages and still not run out of material that makes my blood curdle, but I will not:
Democracy; individual liberties; the ability to have civil discourse or even the right to maintain our value systems is a privilege that we have to fight for, and not an entitlement.
The arrogance of “it cannot happen to us” or “we are better than that” is, to me, much more dangerous than the fights we see coming. We are so busy feeling ‘warm’ and ‘fuzzy’ about how much better we are than everyone else in the world, that we forget to be who we are.
I will end with a personal story. In 1979, I worked for a British bank and was sent, at relative short notice, to Uganda. This was soon after Idi Amin had been overthrown. I had heard a lot about Kenya but knew very little about Uganda, at the time. I remember staying a couple of nights in Nairobi (Kenya) enroute to Kampala (Uganda), and being struck by the sheer beauty of Kenya. I then reluctantly left Kenya & boarded the flight from Nairobi to Kampala. At some point, the flight was crossing the border between Kenya & Uganda and I looked out of my window. I have never seen a prettier country than Uganda – no country was comparable. It seemed like a picture post card, but that is neither here nor there (I just had to get it off my chest because no one I have ever talked to expects me to say that Uganda is the prettiest country I have ever seen…or at least it was in 1979).
I arrive in Kampala and, am greeted at Entebbe airport by 16 year old Tanzanian troops, with machine guns. I am told curfew starts at 6pm, every day. Someone forgot to tell me that there was a civil war on!!
In the months that followed, I was reminded of that curfew by the sounds of machine gun fire outside my window every night, at 6pm sharp. I frequently saw dead bodies on the street outside my window and, in case I needed further reminders, one day I was sitting with the Chief Teller, at the bank. Her phone rang and I could see her expression change. She was speaking Swahili, so I could only understand bits & pieces, but I could tell her from her expression that it was something serious. She hung up the phone and told me she must go home. I asked her if everything was alright & she said “my son called to say that my brother had been shot”.
The next day I saw her at work & asked her how her brother was? She told me that he had been shot by the Tanzanians, & had died. I asked her why she was at work? Her answer is still stuck in my head – I do not have that luxury of staying home because I have to feed my kids…and now my brothers kids.
I remember being struck by her dignity and realizing, at that moment, that even sorrow is a luxury of us, the economically privileged.
I learned, from her, in the months that followed that there was virtually not a single staff in that branch who had not lost family or a friend to either Idi Amin or the Tanzanian troops who followed but looking at them & talking to them, I would never have guessed.
My point of this long-winded story is that there may be dark days ahead, for us, but who will we be on the other side of it?
To that one person who does not know me, but nonetheless read this document, thank you for the privilege of your time. There are some things that I still need to get off my chest, so I will write more blogs every Tuesday following this one.
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The America I Loved
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